how a red punch buggy driver restored my faith in humanity (for now...)

Friday, March 08, 2013

lately, i am doing serious battle with my pregnant psyche. most days, i force myself to get dressed in something that is not elastic. most days, i put make up on, and most days, i curl my hair. mostly i do this to combat the frightful non-curled hair, no make up, elastic rocking image of gracie that greets me and makes me feel like a gross pregnant lady. ahhh third trimester - a rewelcome of exhaustion plus extreme discomfort plus what in my mind is the equivalent of morbid obesity. make way, grace is barreling down the hall. i have now taken to grunting whenever i try to get up off a chair, or roll over in bed.  most days, i do not feel too great about myself. i am tired. i am cranky. and despite my best efforts to not be a crazy pregnant lady, i am losing - terribly. you see our move got pushed back even more. but most of our house is packed up. what remains to be packed, i cannot pack because there's this baby in my belly that prevents me from being able to bend without grimacing (and he lets me know it too, with a few swift, yet powerful kicks that sometimes bring me to my knees, "mom, quit bending over, you're crowding me out here!") someday, when he is older, i am going to remind him of this and inform him that he was merely a renter, and i the owner and i WILL BE collecting overdue rent!!!! so i am overwhelmed.
 
on top of the stress of now being delayed in moving until two weeks before baby is due, everyone i talk to says that if i do not want to go into labor early, i should limit my unpacking. well, sure that sounds great, except i have this INCREDIBLE need to feel settled, which i am fairly certain cannot happen while everything is still in boxes. it is a conundrum. i guess this is when i cash in my friend chips and call all hands on deck!
 
and the whipped cream and cherry on top of it all is lately, i have discovered that people suck. yes all you rush hour washington, dc metro riders, you stink. everyone avoids my eyes when i get on board in the morning, lest anyone feel obligated to relinquish a seat for the nine months pregnant lady. even older generationed men avert their eyes. seriously people, were you raised in caves by rabid wolves??? it's a problem when i give up my seat to a woman who looks more pregnant than i do.
 
but today, on my drive home from the doctor's office, i decided to stop by chik-fil-a for a spicy chicken biscuit sandwich, because sometimes, you just need one of those to get your day started. i pulled into the drive thru, ordered my biscuit and patiently waited to pull up to the pay window. i almost honked at the little red punch buggy in front of me who did not move right away when the car in front of him moved (what can i say, grouchy grace was visiting). but i did not honk and reveal my impatience. he finally pulled up to the window, paid, got his food, and pulled away. now my turn - i could practically taste that chicken biscuit. as i rolled down my window, the lady handed me the food and said, "the car in front of you paid for your meal." and somehow, that small, $2.49 gesture turned my mood around. there are decent people out there who believe in doing kind things for total strangers.
 
so i drove off into the already risen sun, munching away, with one hand holding my biscuit, and the other the steering wheel, when a toyota truck almost rammed me off the road. and the indignity of it all, i could barely honk at him because i did not want to drop my free spicy chicken biscuit. a one-handed steering wheel controlling attempt at an aggressive honk really equates to scaring the nearby ants. maybe. but boy did that biscuit go down good.
 


1 comment:

  1. hilarious! and oh gracie do i feel your pain! except that i at least do not know when (or if!) we are moving so i don't have everything in boxes. that must be awful! i've been thinking for months that we were going to move right before my due date but it looks like that will obviously not happen and so we finally rearranged so that we could actually have space where we are for now. so, anyways, i really feel for you and hope that you get some great friends in there to help you out! i wish i was there to help...direct;)
    love you.

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